Here Comes the Sun...

I learned in Mr. Bauer's 7th grade science class that light travels faster than sound. He did this super cool demonstration for us. He stood on a hill with band cymbals and had us walk and walk, far, far away from him (Maybe 3 football fields). When we got to our spot he had us turn around to face him. Then he crashed those two huge cymbals together. We saw him hit the cymbals together, and then moments later we heard the cymbal crash! It made a big impression. I loved Mr. Bauer. Some teachers are like that, they know how to teach to kids.

I'm now beginning to believe that light also travels quicker than HEAT. I don't have Mr. Bauer to ask about that, but it just seems to me as though there ought to be a bit more warmth here along with all of this sunshine.

I'm reminded again of my tendency to focus on LACK. My mind just habitually "goes there". Rather than being grateful for the sun, I focus on the LACK of warmth. Negativity isn't something I want to do, or something I NEED to do. It's just something I naturally do. Silly, silly human--creature of habit.

What makes this all okay for me today is that I'm aware of it. This was not always the case. In the past I would not have even acknowledged it was negativity! In recovery we say that you can't change what you don't acknowledge. We have Steps 4, 5 and 10 to make us aware and hold us accountable--continually--for our actions. We check in with our fellow brothers and sisters in recovery to make sure this is so.

And in Nia--I can go even deeper!! How lucky am I??? Principle 5: Awareness and Dancing Through Life. I became aware of my feelings first and now I am becoming acutely aware of what it's like to live in my body. What a magnificent machine it is. How lucky I am to be able to move the way I can. And what amazing creatures we are.

The abuse I endured as a little girl began the nasty cycle of self-hatred and shame, but it didn't take long for me to pick the ball up and run with it.

40 years. I spent forty years in a prison of flesh. I was a slave to my own vicious self-talk and my own tyrannical rules. Fighting this and that. If only this ONE THING were different. Well, no more. Not with Nia.

The Human Art Gallery at my White Belt was among the most exquisite, and most PROFOUND parts of my whole week, perhaps in my life. I wept. We are all truly BREATHTAKING. And SO BEAUTIFUL.
The life-giving Sun radiates within all of us...